Mario sat quietly in his office. Tapping, tapping, tapping. He had to come up with a Mario script in twenty-four hours if he wanted to make a Mario movie. He sat, glazed to his paper, his hand moved like a robot's hand to grab his coffee and sipped it (Mario sipped, not the hand). He did it every minute. Mario was shaking.
Already, he had been thinking for twenty-one hours. He had very little time left. It wasn't that he hadn't tried writing. He did that alright. Except, he had crumbled them up and threw them behind him. Now, his office looked like a landfill. Withtout the land to fill it with.
"Eureka! I've got it!" He scrambled to work thinking to himself.
"Okay, what a great story! An adventure movie! Okay, I'm standing in the sewer, giving the pipe a fixing, when all of the sudden the walls crack and water floods in. I'm gasping for air and swimming around. The current carries me down twoards.....somewhere. I try to swim upstream, but it can't be done. I get hurled down in the pit and cry for help and..........and......and......oh man." He crumbles it up and tosses it behind him. Mario then began to scribble furiously.
"I got it this time! A romance flick! I come sprawling over the wall in a Romeo git-up and....what if I were to trip? Oh well. There's got to be a little comedy. Then I look up and, Alas! Be it to my badeth lucketh! Noeth oneth is thereth! Whereth is Peacheth? And what's with this stupid accent? Okay, slash romance." He thought longer. Then he got it.
"No romance here! An action flick! I'm riding in my car, just down the road, when the Koopa Kids come out, dressed in those pin stripe, gangster, Al Capone, suits. They've got these machine guns and start firing. I grab my machine gun and fire back. They duck but come back up with twenty two shotgun. I bring out my rocket launcher. Explosions are blasting everywhere. They come back with bazookas. My car blows up and I fly behind crates. I come out with a flame thrower and flame 'em! They get these grenades and, boy, do they got bad arms. Then, I pull out a tank and blast them! The pull out jets and fly around, around me dropping bombs. They drop this H-bomb and I, uh, well, somehow get away. I then pull out this pea shooter and.....pea shooter? They start coming at me with H-bombs and.......bad story!" Mario crumbles it up and tosses it behind him.
"Horror! Horror! Okay. I'm walking around and there's Luigi, all hunched over. I open a case and inside is my Instant Make A Frankenstien Monster Set. I take out this powder and drop water on it. Poof! Bowser, with a weird head, appears, and raises up. Okay, I scream 'It's alive!' He does this roar thing, and Luigi faints. 'It's alive, alive, alive, alive! Ha, ha, ha, ha!' It looks and me and believe it, it speaks. 'Hungry!' I notice he's looking at me. 'Eat fat plumber with bad face!' I start to back up. He gets up and comes at me with his arms sticking out. I notice the door is locked. (Thing like that always happen in monster movies. The car doesn't stop, the door doesn't open, etc). He grabs me and brings me twoards his mouth. Ahhhhhhh! Not a good story." Mario begans to walk back and forth.
"Let's try this one. Mystery! There I am, dressed in those Sherlock Holmes things. There is Toad, wearing a nice suit, a derby hat, and a mustache that covers half his face. I say, 'It's a lemon tree old Toadston.' 'Don't you mean, elementary?' 'I mean what I say!' 'Whatever you say Molmes.' 'Well, the answer is simple. With the evidence, it turns out the spaghetti was murdered by me!' 'You?!' 'Yes! I was hungry!' 'I'm going to call Scottland's Front Yard!' 'Now! I will eat you!' 'But your'e not Yoshi!' 'I know, but I'm hungry!' Nah, this will never sell." Mario thought one last time.
"Comedy! Slapstick! The Tree Stooges! Arrow and Lardy! Charlie Lapswim! Buster's Beeneaten! Rabbit and Fatello! Okay, we've got something cooking today! Alright, I'm standing there, with a strange hair, it's almost covering my eyes and it's like that all the way around. There's Luigi, he's got hair on both sides, sticking up. Also, Toad's there and he's bald. This is what I say.
Mario: "Alright pinecone! Get to work."
Luigi: "Allelujah!"
Toad: 'Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.'
Mario: 'What's that mean short stuff?'
Toad: 'Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.'
Luigi: 'Stop talking like that!'
Mario: 'Hey! Only I give the orders!'
I slap Luigi, and he slaps me. Pretty soon, we're in a slapping contest. Then it turns into a massacer. Somehow, Toad gets in the fight and it's.....a bad story."
Mario's eyes start swirling. He's laughing like a mad man. He grins a weird grin. Then he yells,
